Cil's Cozy Corner

Replay

2012-01-29T20:55:00.003+07:00

A model is not a model until (s)he is able to nail every single photo shoot (s)he has.
A photographer is not a photographer until (s)he is able to bring the model-self of each of his/her object.

Pretty disappointed and upset. *sigh*

Wine Blooded

2012-01-27T21:57:00.002+07:00

Good friends are the ones who tell us the truth about ourselves. Even when the truth might be something we're reluctant to admit. That we still have a great deal to learn. That we sometimes need to ask for help. That we may be overlooking a golden opportunity.

(Desperate Housewives)

Everything at Once

2012-01-25T22:31:00.002+07:00

On the first day of CNY, Vana and I went to Maha Vihara Maitreya. Lit some candles inside the temple and hung our wishes on the wishing tree.

We were walking to the parking lot to wait for Jose when we saw the flying lanterns. Excited max of course! I called Jose and asked him to park his car instead of merely passing by to pick us up. =pp

Headed to Cu's house for 拜年 and ate A LOT there. He literally stuffed us with food. Lols.

OH! These look like pre-wedding photos, don't you think so?

Today is the third day of Chinese New Year and by far the least crowded ever. No annual CNY-1 lunch at my place. No CNY hanging out session. No CNY+1 road trip. *sigh* No, I’m not saying this year’s CNY was boring but it’s just different. I did go out with LBD-ers but not the usual clique. I’m not complaining though. ;)

I know this sounds very cliché but I just have to say it: Time does fly! 不知不觉 my hols will be over in ten days. Huaaa! I really don’t feel like burying myself into assignments and quizzes again. *facepalm*

One Day Diary

2012-01-17T21:12:00.002+07:00

Sunday, 10ish pm, Whatsapp group chat.

Cu: Besok jadi ga? Jam berapa? Ke mana?
Bek: Terserah. Gua ok2 aja.
Vana: Sate?
Me: Cily ga bisa.
Cu: Ga bisa ikut atau ga bisa makan sate?
Me: Ga bisa ikut.
Cu: Lho. Kenapa?
Vana: Atau Socrates aja.
Bek: Biasa. Sibuk tak menentu. Lol.
Cu: Boleh. Ivana bisa bosan ga makan Socrates lagi? Haha.
Bek: Socrates enak kok.
Vana: Ga kok. Yos, Socrates holiao loh..
Cu: Lol. Ok lo.
Me: Ga pasti, ntah bisa ga besok.
Cu: Besok ketemu jam 12, ok? Ketemu di Socrates jam 12. Jangan telat2.
Vana: Kasi range lah ya. Jam 12-1. Paling telat jam 1.
Bek: Ok.
Cu: Sip lah.

Monday, 10ish am, Whatsapp group chat.

Cu: Cily dah pasti ga bisa ikut?
Fed: Emcai ar..
Me: Ga bisa. :(

Monday, 11ish am, SMS.

Me: Ntar kalian jadi ke Socrates? Jam? G bisa liao, ga jadi keluar sama temen.
Cu: Jadi. Jam 12.
Me: Jemput diriku donk. Bisa? ;;)
Cu: Ok.
Me: Jam 12 mpe Socrates atau jam 12 lu baru jalan dari Cemara?
Cu: Ini uda sama Fedry menuju tempat lu.
Me: Hoiiii! Bentar nyetirnya! Santai yaks. G baru mao mandi. Be ready in 20mins.

Someone Like Them

2012-01-15T12:33:00.002+07:00

Vana meant to type "Ivana is kind!" but it ended up to be "Ivana is bejat kind of stupid." Trolololol!! LBD is the best when it comes to silly stuff like this. =DD And oh, that "Sate ajo" was the group's name as Fed created this group to arrange our next culinary trip. =pp

Carpe Diem

2012-01-11T16:04:00.004+07:00

Bandung: Cheap food, a lot of places to go but no friends.
Medan: Expensive food, (almost) nowhere to go but tons of friends.

Saw this epic parking in front of our high school. One step back and JLEB!

Coffee time in Opal Coffee. It's not candid photos of the guys, they knew I was taking their pictures.

Candid ones. Except mine, of course.

Me: Let's take a photo of our shoes.
Gus: I'm wearing sandals.
Me: Don't care.
Fed: *took his slippers off* Shoes are too mainstream.

Vana and yours truly, friends since 1991.

I. Just. Had. To. Camwhore.

Fed: You said you don't like children but you keep playing with him.
Me: I don't. I really don't. I am just afraid he will hit the table's corner.

Shanzha! One of my favourite childhood snacks!

Anyway, went to a wedding dinner with mom after I got back from Opal. You know you drink too much when the beer SPG gave you a thumb up. True story. How I managed to not trip in my high heels is still a mystery, not to mention I did walk down the stairs as well. Smh. Slept in my dress and make-up as I was too tipsy to do anything once I got into my room. *facepalm* First hangover in 2012. More to come? ;)

Merry Go Round

2012-01-08T11:43:00.004+07:00

Vana said she's jealous of my slim arms. Lols. I find it funny because we used to be the duo skinny whom every woman envied. Now, just like everybody else, we have to start counting our calory intake. Smh.

The Woman

2012-01-05T13:48:00.002+07:00

Sherlock is back!! Woohoo!! Those two trailers above don't do any justice to the series. Smh. You like Robert Downey's Sherlock? Wait until you see this one! It's 9372723747984719x better! Okay, I know I'm comparing an apple to an orange, but seriously, Sherlock is one of the BESTEST TV series ever! The first eps of season 2 is titled "A Scandal in Belgravia" which is adapted from Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's "A Scandal in Bohemia".

"To Sherlock Holmes she is always THE woman. I have seldom heard him mention her under any other name. In his eyes she eclipses and predominates the whole of her sex. It was not that he felt any emotion akin to love for Irene Adler. All emotions, and that one particularly, were abhorrent to his cold, precise but admirably balanced mind. He was, I take it, the most perfect reasoning and observing machine that the world has seen, but as a lover he would have placed himself in a false position. He never spoke of the softer passions, save with a gibe and a sneer. They were admirable things for the observer — excellent for drawing the veil from men's motives and actions. But for the trained reasoner to admit such intrusions into his own delicate and finely adjusted temperament was to introduce a distracting factor which might throw a doubt upon all his mental results. Grit in a sensitive instrument, or a crack in one of his own high-power lenses, would not be more disturbing than a strong emotion in a nature such as his. And yet there was but one woman to him, and that woman was the late Irene Adler, of dubious and questionable memory."

First paragraph of "A Scandal in Bohemia"

My favourite scene from this eps:

Irene: What are you talking about?
Sherlock: You.
Irene: Oh, dear God. Look at the poor man. You don't actually think I was interested in you? Why? Because you're the great Sherlock Holmes, the clever detective in the funny hat?
Sherlock: No. Because I took your pulse. Elevated. Your pupils dilated. I imagine John Watson thinks love's a mystery to me, but the chemistry is incredibly simple and very destructive.

The way cocky-genius Sherlock deducts that Irene was interested in him is the ultimate victory. Won my heart instantly. Not to mention I giggled like siao during that scene. Smh. I'm so looking forward to the next eps. I hope Irene Adler will appear again although in the book she only appears once. >.<"

Oink Oink

2012-01-04T22:18:00.000+07:00

Gus: Tau ga? Gw makan babi kecap di Pasar Atum. Ga enak banget.

Me: Babi selaen di Medan, mana ada yang enak.
Gus: Samcan semua ga ada daging sama sekali dan kaldunya ga terasa. 22rb.
Me: Mahal donk. =.="

Me: Jelek bener itu babi kecap. Ga fotogenik.
Gus: Bukan ga fotogenik. Uda kenyataan. Masa telor dipotong pake gunting. Di Medan pasti pake pisau atau benang.
Me: Pake gunting?? Penghinaan untuk telor itu!
Gus: Sedih gw ngeliat tu babi kecap. Jahat amat ada orang masak kek gitu. Sia2 pengorbanan si babi dan si telor.

X Factors

2012-01-03T17:22:00.005+07:00

What's been on my mind these days in random order:

1. Having this sudden urge and temptation of having my hair chopped soon. That and mom's endless complaint about how messy my hair is. I'm thinking about bob and side-swept fringe. Yeah, something like Cily circa 2009.

What do you think?

2. Been persuading mom to award ourselves a brief vacation. Mom isn't okay yet but I won't give up easily. Me need an escapade! And shopping as well. Lols.

3. Once a Queen Bee, forever a Queen Bee. I may have been out from Medan for some months but I'm still the Queen Bee. Can't wait for this Thursday for dinner with Ancu, Fed and Jimy. And next Tuesday for pork hunting session with Gus!

4. Photo project! I've got the theme already! Yayness! Although it's already 3rd of January yet I haven't started any. Smh. Guess imma wait till February as I don't go out that often in Medan.

5. Dance project. Omoo~ This is seriously a chuak and kanceong one! Even the thought of it gives me goosebumps. >.<" Am planning this and that with Ellyn every single night. Wish me luck? ;)

6. OH! Laptop won't start! Fml. Friends keep telling me to have it repaired asap. But the thought of exposing my data to a total stranger freaks the hell out of me. Smh. I'll wait for Sen to get well and let him check it out instead of bringing it to the service centre.

7. February has always been my favourite month as most of my friends are back in town. Was thinking about how nice it is to gather with them when it struck me, I won't be in Medan in February! Major blah!

8. You may bring me out of the bitchy club but you won't be able to suck the bitchiness out of me. I thought I was a changed woman, considering I didn't go mental during my first semester in college, regardless the countless triggers. Oh well, I didn't go soft, apparently the devil side of me was merely suppressed. You know what's scary? The fact that it's all getting back to me.

9. New phone. New camera. Ohmmm~~ Ooohmm~~

Show Stopper

2011-12-31T12:36:00.010+07:00

Yup, "wheeeeee and whoaaaaaaa" & "omoooooooo and gyaaaaaa" from previous posts were referring to a photo shoot. *blush*

Went all "wheeeeee and whoaaaaaaa" because, you know, it's a photo shoot! And the "omoooooooo and gyaaaaaa"? Urm.. Remember when I said it's going to be pretty huge? It's because it's meant to be a topless one. Yes, topless as in semi naked as in wearing nothing as my top.

When Nd first told me I had to be on my birthday suit, I was a bit reluctant. Nude photo shoot has always been one of my dream shots yet it costs a fortune to hire a professional photographer for it. After asking around, I decided to give it a shot. Pun intended. ;)

Then, I had the idea of doing a lingerie shot as well. *blush* I mean, why not? Went lingerie hunting a day before the shot and failed! The pair I had my eye on was so bloody expensive! Around 800k! Even La Senza is a bit cheaper and undoubtedly sexier of course. So yeah, had to cross the lingerie shot off. *facepalm*

On our way to the studio, Nd gave me this nerve-wrecking prep talk. *sigh* "Don't disappoint me, you know. I've prepared everything for days. Be all out, please," he said. I kept nodding and nodding. As if that hadn't scared the hell out of me, he added, "If I am not satisfied with the result, I'm gonna put you into my black list, no more photo shoots for you." Omoo!!

Make-up and hair-do went smoothly. Didn't expect the purple-themed make-up so I secretly smirked in happiness. Lols. The MUA stuck FOUR falsies on my upper eyelashes and TWO on the lower ones. My eyes went from O.O to -.- No kidding! "I don't need to smize anymore, the falsies do it for me," said I. Oh, in case you're not a fan of ANTM , "smize" means smile with your eyes.

Anyway, the thing with my face is, it changes drastically after make-up and it's mostly unpredictable. Initially, the make-up was intended to make me look sensual but I transformed to Evil Lady (the MUA said I looked so devilish) instead. Lols. Seeing me and the make-up result, Nd asked me to try on a corset. When I got out from the fitting room, he got this brand new concept on his head so yeah, the nude photo shoot was CANCELLED.

Was I disappointed? A teensy bit. It was more to relief, to be honest. Apparently, I'm not ready for bold shoots yet. Smh. Who knows imma do it next semester hols? ;)

Feel like kena con reading the whole blog post yet no topless me? Lols.

Tiok 9gag already, almost incurable. Smh.

Photographer: Andy Susanto
Make-up & hair-do by: Heru Heriawan
Photo editor: Jeff Kie
Special thanks to Brides of Dejavu for the studio!

Friends said the photoshop on my left arm is so obvious. Yes, my left arm was photoshopped. But unlike what people say, it's not photoshopped to be smaller, in fact it's edited to be bigger than the real size. Oh, and to make it balance because my arms are a bit muscly.

All in all, extremely pleased with yesterday's photo shoot. Looking forward to another one. >.<"

On a totally random note, I managed to knot a cherry stem for the first time! Lols!!

Barriers

2011-12-29T18:17:00.003+07:00

If only it's that easy. *sigh*

Anyway, it's 30th tomorrow! Went from "wheeeeee and whoaaaaaaa" to "omoooooooo and gyaaaaaa". I wish I could babble about it but better not jinx it. Wish me luck!

In Person

2011-12-27T16:11:00.005+07:00

Him: Your friends know that you call me Babi?

Me: Of course!
Him: Geez! They must think I have piggy appearance.
Me: Lols!!

PS: Pardon my ngiao-ngiao face. >.<"
PPS: NO, we're NOT getting back together!!

Bottle Up

2011-12-26T16:12:00.001+07:00

Another weekend went just like that. Zap! and it's all gone. Which means I had a terrific one!! Well, thanks to all the fun I had, Mr. Fever came to visit me last night and is overstaying my welcome. *sigh*

Anyway, when I said I had fun, people should get that by "fun" I mean "food". Yes, food and lots of food!! I've crossed some items from my to-eat list and I really can't wait for Vianly to come back home. Me want bakso Barokah and nasi Gumarang! *drool*

1. Sate Padang Nasional.
2. Mie Pangsit 09 (Binjai)
3. Tahukua Heci (Brahrang)
4. Indomie Goreng Elisabeth
5-6. Ucok Durian

Urm, there was actually more food from Sushi Tei and Taipan BUT I forgot to take any photos as I went siao once the food was served. *blush*

Gathering with some LBD-ers on Christmas day. They're like the best friends EVER. We've graduated from high school for more than SEVEN YEARS yet we still talk like we've never been separated. That is something, right? Jose asked me to plan for something on NYE. I guess I'm still the EO + Queen Bee. :">

On a total different note, I've got something pretty huge on the 30th. To say I'm excited is a total understatement!! I'm all wheeeeee and whoaaaaaaa!! Not like it makes any sense, I know. Wish me luck, will you? ;)

Tied Down

2011-12-24T10:41:00.002+07:00

Timothy's side of story and Audrey's side of story. Read both!

Just like a million other people who teared while watching the video, I did too! Turned out I am not as heartless as I thought, heh? Lols.

It brought back memories of a certain night in 2008 when J "proposed" to me. Kind of. Lols. We were chatting on the phone (more like I did all the talking and he did all the agreeing part), when he suddenly talked about his future house stuff or whatever, I have forgotten. ._____."

Him: The house will be like this and like that and so on and so on. You will be like this and that and be doing blablabla.
Me: Wait. Why am I in the picture?
Him: You want to get married to me, no?
Me: Is this a proposal?
Him: I think so.
Me: You suck! Big time!

I didn't give him any answer that night though. Smh. Didn't tell Momsie as I knew she would agree with my decision, whatever it was. Meanwhile, my friends were harder to conquer. Went to Veiz and Kent for their opinions and critics. None of them liked the idea of me spending the rest of my life with him but they didn't disagree either, so again, the decision was all on me.

Spent days and days considering this and that. Then, some weeks after the proposal and some weeks prior to my birthday, I texted J, "For my birthday present, I want an engagement ring."

He didn't give me of course, siao meh? Lols. Although there's no ring whatsoever, I started calling him fiance just for the sake of it. It's still funny no matter how I reminisce it. Lols. Too bad we had to call everything off in 2010. Nobody saw it coming, but we had to do what had to be done. ;)

As for this moment, we remain best friends. A relationship concept that Momsie would never ever fathom. Lols. Some days ago, when I got back from a meal with him, she said, "If you two are still good even though you've spent the last six months out of Medan, why don't you consider getting back together?" Huahuahuaaa.. Because that's impossible, mom. ;) We have moved on and we have let each other go. Completely. Yes, we still have that certain spot in each other's heart but that's it, nothing more.

For better or worse, it's just something everybody needs to get over with. Gah! I need to stop before I go all mellow. ;)

Little Bird

2011-12-23T20:52:00.003+07:00

Checked my final test score online last night and it was major disappointment. Nope, I'm not talking about the final test itself but the KAT scores are killing me!

I got 8 for both Hatsuon and Hyoki. I was kinda expecting my Hatsuon KAT to be low as I didn't submit the final assignment. Thus, I deserve it, right? But HYOKI? THAT I didn't see it coming. ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME? It's the only subject I was sure I could nail! Okay, I was absent for two or three times for the whole semester, but we're allowed to skip the classes for SIX times! I was always one of the first students to finish the tasks given in the class, mind you, most of the time I was the first! WHAT DID I DO TO GET THAT 8? Is it because I missed ONE quiz due to my little escapade to Jakarta? Dammit!!

If I'm not wrong I also missed ONE quiz in my Hyogen class yet my score isn't that low. Not to mention, I once score 5 in one of the quizzes because I misread the instruction. What happened in Hyoki?

I feel nothing but a total failure. And this side of me isn't something I can handle on my own. Shoot.

Mirror Mirror

2011-12-22T18:25:00.003+07:00

All of this shows nothing but how dumb you are. I hope that was the last time you tried to insult me. Believe me, you have no idea whom you're messing with. No eff has been given so far, right? Quit being such a drama queen when I'm still nice, will you? Don't make yourself regret. ;)

You know that feeling when you never want something but when it's made forbidden, you will do everything to make it yours? Exactly. Stop when it's still an option. Or else imma make you. Quit before I really intent on making it mine. Now, none of us wants it, right? ;)

Just stop.

How Far We've Been

2011-12-21T11:53:00.001+07:00

Cherise came to Bandung and asked me to be her tour guide which I gladly did. =D Told Veiz's sister, Riana, about it and we ended up planning the itinerary. Yeah, she joined us as well.

Friday:

Went to Hyper Paskal Square at night. Nothing much to do there except eating and camwhoring. =)

Saturday:

When I went to Tangkuban Perahu in October, it was pretty cold. However, the Sun was really scorching on last Saturday. I swear I got darker. Hikss..

Stopped by Lembang to have our lunch and all of us were surprised by the size of the chickens. They're so tiny. Riana and I are the ultimate Medanese, we eat A LOT but never get fat. We are blessed, aren't we? =pp

Maribaya afterwards. See the bridge? It's really strong but none of us dared walk to the other side. Acrophobia, that is. Riana and I ended up walking halfway for the sake of photos.

Had our dinner in Kampung Daun before we headed back to Bandung. Kampung Daun is nice and romantic and comfy and stuff but I really don't think I'm willing to go that far for the so-so food anymore. Yeah, food over ambience, that's me.

Sunday:

Breakfast at Batagor Kingsley. All of us didn't get why Jakartan and Bandungnese are so crazy about it. The batagor and siomay taste merely passable. Not to mention it's over-priced as well (for Bandung rate).

Anyway, as the day before was burning, I decided to wear T-shirt and shorts to Kawah Putih. Turned out it was freezing cold. ._____. I used Cherise's beach sarong to cover my legs and yeah I looked so silly there. Haish.

Me: Don't you wish we had some booze right now?
Riana: Yeah. It would come in handy.
Me: We would spend our time here, sitting on the rocks, reminiscing old memories while drinking.
Riana: And get drunk?
Us: Huahuahauhauhaua!!

The lunch we had in Ciwidey was great. Cheap and finger-licking good! Riana finished almost the whole portion of the fish by herself.

Last, what's Bandung without visiting Dago Pakar? This time, instead the old time Sierra, I decided to give Cocorico a try. Not bad. A tad over-priced but still tolerable.

As I had so much fun with Riana last weekend, I can't wait for any upcoming trips! =DD

ここにいるよ

2011-12-20T22:56:00.000+07:00

Last step in Husein Sastranegara for this year. So long, Bandung! See you in a month. ;)

Mie pangsit Ayu!
Had told the seller not to put any onion spring but she forgot. TT______TT

J's Indomie goreng! Finally!!

Day Too Soon

2011-12-19T23:26:00.005+07:00

"Our ship is beyond respects and all other shits. Whatever winds that blow over regular ships, we've been through it."

I know that you often check this blog recently, so thank you for the heartwarming message. We will see each other sooner than you expected. ;)

Berry to Books

2011-12-16T12:15:00.003+07:00

Left: Fettucine Carbonara + ice lemon tea from some random stall in BTC food court.
Right: Spaghetti a'la Clio + I Am Berry (strawberry + blueberry + blackberry juice) from Clio Cafe.

Had some spontaneous urge to attend the weekly stand up comedy open mic event in Clio Cafe last night. Reached there pretty late and didn't get any seat near the stage. Hence, I couldn't hear the comic's voice clearly. Left after three unfunny comics. And oh, the spaghetti I had there is the worst one I've had in Bandung so far, tasted nothing but oily and spicy. The berry juice is a total nyums though.

On a brighter side, I stopped by Rumah Buku on my way home. They're having 30% discount on all items! Jawdropped! I hope I don't spend too much money for this weekend's trip so I can go siao there before I go home.

Idle And Away

2011-12-15T23:47:00.002+07:00

It seems like we will never ever be able to have civilized conversation anymore, heh? Whenever I try to talk to you or vice versa, we end up getting on each other's nerves. How did we evolve from friends to whatever-this-is?

You're right. It's not mine. But don't you forget, I was the one who had the idea of establishing it. I was the one who persuaded you to do it. I was the one who begged you to hold on to it when you wanted to abandon it. Need I go on? I may not be the capital holder but I have my shares in moral department, don't I?

Now, let's do some flashback. To couples of months ago. I wanted to leave but YOU made me stay. You said some hostile stuff that surprisingly pulled me back. Now that I have the sense of belonging, you are kicking me out? Are you effing kidding me, man?

You have your own reasons, you said? Elaborate, please? Unable to? Ah.. As expected. You know why? Because you yourself know that those things you said are the ultimate craps. None of it makes any sense, not even in the parallel universe.

Listen to yourself, will you? Pay attention to your own sentences and see if they make any slightest sense. Don't insult my intelligence by pulling those bulls. I may not be as bright as you but I'm not some bimbo either, remember?

Let's talk again when both of us are calm, shall we?

春雨裡洗過的太陽

2011-12-11T17:24:00.004+07:00

"Yesterday was Thursday, Thursday. Today i-is Friday, Friday. We-we-we so excited. We so excited. We gonna have a ball today. Tomorrow is Saturday. And Sunday comes afterwards. I don’t want this weekend to end.”

(Friday - Rebecca Black)

Final has ended. Surprise Friday midnight visit from a friend. Food and photo hunting with another friend. Need I say more? This weekend is THE bomb!

Ohai, flip-flops! Wore it with the summer dress I got from Vonny.

The end to my craving for pizza. No, that's not beer as much as I would like to have one. =pp

Walked for quite some time in the rain in the mission of photo hunting. =)

Tea time (literally) in Warung Suluh. I love the effort they put into the interior. Those antiques, the smell of wood plus their choice of music won my heart instantly.

The journey of the day.

To send or not to send, that's the question. ;)

There are two sides of everything. It depends on how we respond to the situation given. Bad or good, our choice. Stop whining and start doing something. That's also a note to myself. =)

PS: Pardon the bad photo editing. It's my first time. :">

Live High

2011-12-08T19:59:00.005+07:00

Found this video randomly and I sincerely believe it is a slap from God. I need to stop sweating over small stuff and start living my life. Limitation is over-rated. Perfection is never the answer to anything.

Him: How was your final?
Me: Miserable. I don't even want to think about it anymore. Those stupid mistakes I made are just unacceptable and intolerable.
Him: You know why you are so messed up right now? It's because you want perfection. Anything less than that brings disappointment to you. Lower your standard, stop being so arrogant and you might find yourself happier.
Me: I guess so.
Him: Ever since you moved there, I've heard nothing but endless sadness from you. Bandung has been effing you. Come back for good, will you?
Me: I won't. You know that.
Him: You and your pride.

Pick Up the Pieces

2011-12-08T14:09:00.002+07:00

We all like to think that we're in the driver's seat of our own lives. But the truth is, the idea that we can control our fate is an illusion. You can choose the most loyal friends, the dream job... The truest love. But at the end of the day, our fate is decided for us. All we can do is hope we have the strength to cope with it.

(Gossip Girl)

Blair: What's going on? Did you have something to do with this?
Chuck: No. Dan arranged it for us.
Blair: What "us"?
Chuck: The "us" I should have fought for when you called. The "us" that is not just you and me, but you, me, and your baby.
Blair: Then... W-why did you tell me to choose Louis?
Chuck: I thought it was selfish if I was the one to tell you to break up your family.
Blair: That was the moment you chose not to be selfish?
Chuck: Well, timing has never been our strong suit. I had it all wrong. Just because Louis is the father of your baby does not mean you should be with him. You should be with me.
Blair: Why?
Chuck: Because I'm going to love your baby as much as I love you.

Chuck-Blair is the only reason I stick to Gossip Girl despite the deteriorating story plot. I've always believed in Chuck and he's proven me right. Funny how some jerks make the best man of your life. Aren't I right, Chuck? ;)

Highway to Hell

2011-12-07T20:31:00.000+07:00

Robin: I never wanted that. Of course, it's one thing not to want something. It's another to be told you can't have it. I guess it's, it's just nice knowing that you could someday do it if you changed your mind. But now, all of a sudden, that door is closed.

Ted: Robin, what's wrong?
Robin: Nothing.
Ted: Just tell me.
Robin: Why do you need to know so bad?
Ted: So I can cheer you up.
Robin: It's not your job to cheer me up.
Ted: Yes, it is. Cheering you up is my job.
Robin: Well, then, you're fired.
Ted: You can't fire me. I'm union, bitch.
Robin: It's not your job to cheer me up.
Ted: Yes, it is.
Robin: No, it's not.
Ted: Yes, it is.
Robin: No, it's not.

Ted: Yes, it is. Look, you don't want to tell me what's wrong, fine. I don't need to know. But you can never stop me from trying to cheer you up. It's a fact of life. You're just gonna have to deal with it.

The latest episode of HIMYM (Symphony of Illumination) is the best ever! Those three scenes above made me all teary. Especially the last two! I am never a sucker for romance but I am a big fan of opposite-sex friendship. ;)

My first guy friend ever! A.k.a my childhood friend.

He used to come to my house every morning to settle his "morning business". A very good friend of my anak kos in Medan.

My friend/senior/tutor. No, I don't prefer asking around to google the answer by myself. =pp~

My cousin, actually.

My ex partner-in-crime. ;)

That awkward moment when you called your friend on fb chat and his wife replied. Smh.

Anyway, I am quite sure I flunked my final. Kiso was pretty crappy, Pancasila was shitty, stupid mistakes in Hatsuon and some missed points in Hyogen. I almost burst into tears, no kidding. But whatever, the damage was done. Haish. I need hugs. ='(

At this moment, all I want is for final to finish soon, get over with LDK stuff (whatever it is) and GO HOME!

I am young, you are young, we are young!

Five down, two to go!

That's My Shhh

2011-12-06T14:40:00.004+07:00

This morning, this little guy got into my room by the window ...

... and played with my camera string like a boss.

Went I came back from the campus, he was in front of my window again and looked like he was waiting for me. Aww~~

And you know what? He came to me when he saw me! >.<"

And stood still when I asked him to.

Cuteness overload!!

Three down, four to go!

The Three Musketeers

2011-12-05T21:50:00.003+07:00

One called me just to tell me he's going to my favourite restaurant. Then an hour later he called just to inform me that restaurant was full and he had dinner at another favourite restaurant of mine instead.

One doesn't want to tell me if he's coming to see me or not. "Let's see," said he. I dislike his "surprise". As that means I will have to sit idly the whole day, waiting for him to show up. Die die also have to doll myself since he's gonna side-eye me so hard if I look "homey".

One talked about food with me and then went MIA in just a blink of eyes. How does somebody take food so lightly?

What day is it today? Piss-Cily-off day?

And why do I sound so Singaporean these days? Siao.

Mash

2011-12-05T16:48:00.006+07:00

Introduced by my tutor/friend on our last session and has stuck on my mind since. ;)

Him: Kamu makan apa jadinya?
Me: Baru beli putu. Uda habis dan ini lage mikir mao makan apa lage.
Him: Oh, baguslah. Putu kan bentuknya hampir sama kek sushi dan btw aku mao ke Sushi Tei.
Me: Diam!

When I get home, I'll make sure he brings me to Sushi Tei every week! I'm sooo gonna suck his wallet dry! >;)

Obsession

2011-12-03T19:38:00.001+07:00

Final test mode: ON!!

Chapter I: First Flight

2011-12-03T00:37:00.006+07:00

Very outdated photos from our first photo hunting session.

欠揍。

What was in our mind? Smh.

I like my eyes here. *blush*

You always have a place under my umbrella. ;)

Another photo that would make my cousin burst into laughter. Meooww~~ >.<"

Reflection of Manga

2011-12-02T23:22:00.003+07:00

No more than five letters are needed to illustrate yesterday: manga.

Rain. checked
Candlelight dinner. checked
Moon. checked
Star. checked

I was never a sucker for romance but last night managed to change my mind. Turned out a night full of cheesy scenes could shoo the cynical me away for a while. ;)

House on a hill with crescent moon in the background. Say aww? >.<" I'm disappointed in my photos though, too blurry.

Sometimes, we are locked in our self-made shadow that we fail to recognize the true us. Hence, we depend on our mask too much and fool the world.

Chapter VI.

Fly Fly Butterfly

2011-12-02T22:14:00.005+07:00

It flew into my room and stayed on the right side of my bed #likeaboss. Notice how tiny it is compared to the star?

The Lazy Song

2011-12-01T23:12:00.004+07:00

Small talk with mom, a simple "I know" from him, endless chat with Vianly and to end this fabulous day, there's the photo hunting session! Too bad, most of the photos I took are blur.

I hope with all the distraction I got, my lazy period is to end soon. *fingers crossed*

Fatigue

2011-11-30T22:26:00.002+07:00

Texas Pasteur - Griya Pasteur - BIP - Gramedia Merdeka - Riau Junction - IP

Walked pretty much this afternoon yet my problem has not walked away yet. :( What sux is I am totally clueless on what it is. I have no idea what is occupying my mind at this moment. All I know is my brain is super packed. :( Mom's voice calmed me down for a little while though. :)

When even retail therapy can't help, I know I'm in a deep shit.

Point Taken

2011-11-29T19:56:00.003+07:00

Last Pancasila class! =D

My hair was supposed to be curlier but it went straight after my tuition session. No kidding. Japanese grammar points - especially the particles - suck the life out of me. おもしろいですが、とても難しいです！

Anyway, I told my tutor about the additional classes my lecturer is giving this week and he was a bit surprised when I said I prefer tuition with him to classes with my lecturer. I was prepared when he asked me the legendary question, "Why tuition?" Well, that question was asked repeatedly during my school days. And I kinda memorize the answer by now. ;)

I hate courses for as long as I can remember. I dislike sharing the teacher with a bunch of ungrateful students. I loathe it when my classmates take the class for granted. I detest being called "the teacher's pet". But most of all, I can't stand sitting around doing nothing while waiting for slow students to get a grip of the lesson being taught. Yes, I am THAT arrogant.

Another question mark from my tutor, “But at least that's free, you don't have to waste any money, unlike the tuition sessions with me.”

Yes, I know the extra classes with my lecturer are free, but being the snob I am, I'm pretty sure I'll get nothing out of it. What I'm trying to say is, I've been attending classes with my classmates for almost a semester, I know them. Spending extra hours with them won't do me any good. Just like that thing I loathe the most, I most probably will be slacking around, waiting for them. Like usual. Why waste my time on that? When I obviously can force my brain to work harder during my tuition session? I may spend more money than I'm supposed to, but hey, it's worth it!

"Why are you being hard on yourself? Your average score is above 9 and that's good, you know," my tutor wondered. Either I'm the first Virgo he gets to know or the other Virgos are not achievement freaks like me. As a proud Virgo, I settle for nothing less than perfection. ;) 9 is not good enough for me. It means there are still some points I am missing which also means I haven't mastered the topic yet. It also implies I haven't made the best out of myself. And THAT I can't forgive myself for. ;)

Ah, speaking about missing points, I'd better continue reviewing. =D

PS: The bright side of losing my phone is I blog more often now since I don't get to access my Twitter account easily anymore. ;)

Rainbow

2011-11-29T00:13:00.001+07:00

Instead of hitting the sack earlier, I let my mind wander incessantly. It's just all random and messy and dominating at the same time. Whatever it is.

This week has been the most unexplainable week so far. I could spare myself and do a great job by using merely three letters to describe it: WTF. Yeah, it's been a real wtf period. There are loads of stuff on my mind and as hard as I've been trying to sort them out, I'm always back to where I started.

Argh. I need to tackle down my final test and go home. I miss my home and my "home".

She Said

2011-11-28T20:21:00.005+07:00

Kwetiao Ahiok. Nasi Yulia. Dimsum Babura. Sate Padang Triadi. Bakso Barokah. Baskin Robbins. Indomie goreng Eli. Kentang goreng Suasa. Pancake durian Taipan. Sushi Tei. Sop buntut Sunshine. Pecel lele Sambu. BPK Ondo. Mie pangsit Palembang. Nasi lonte Makmur. Nasi prang Eli. Cakar ayam Dekko. Nasi babi Asan. Gumarang. Miramar. J's Indomie goreng. Bihun bebek Gedeh. Lemper Kalimantan. Nasi kucing. Nasi goreng Surya. Burger Gaboh. Trattoria. Pizza Lekker. J's brownies kukus.

Isn’t it annoying how your brain keeps listing food when you obviously have limited choice of food due to your sickness? The list can go on and on and on. =Q____________

Mom: 生病了？
Me: 只是老毛病而已，敏感而引起了感冒于发烧。
Mom: 怎么流鼻血呢？
Me: 不是流鼻血啦，可能是吸鼻涕吸得太夸张了，所以鼻孔伤了。
Mom: 多吃素菜和水果，你怎么都不听话。。。
Me: 我没事了啦，剩下头晕而已。

Anyway, mom offered to buy me a new plane ticket as my hols is gonna start way earlier than I expected. However, I had to refuse since the price has gone rocket high and it would be a total waste of money. *sigh* Guess nothing I could do except make my days here in Bandung as fun as possible while waiting for the departure date. Or… I could ask for mom’s permission and spend the beginning of my hols in Jakarta. *finger crossed*

First thing first, I have to start reviewing for my final test! Argh!!

Eyes Wide Shut

2011-11-27T22:52:00.003+07:00

Me: Gw saltum nih, ada yang pake dress nih.
Him: Memangnya acaranya di mana?
Me: Aula kampus gitu.
Him: Oh, berarti mereka yang saltum. Btw, lu pake apa?
Me: Kaos dan shorts. Biasalah.
Him: Shorts lu itu yah, dipake di manapun, kapanpun, selalu saltum tau.
Me: Tapi kan nyaman.

Me: Ihh.. Ga bisa pesan nasi goreng porsi setengah.
Him: Gaya lu. Biasa juga nambah.

Him: Gw pengen makan buah ni tiba-tiba.
Me: Gw justru lage malas makan buah. Padahal ada sunkist, mangga, dan apel di kulkas.
Him: Elit bener buah-buahan lu. Gw biasanya cuma beli pepaya.

Him: Eh, gw ntar jadi penerima tamu di pesta sodara gw.
Me: Trus kenapa?
Him: Takut ditanya kapan nikah.
Me: Halah. Tenang aja. Ga bakal ada yang nanya. Anyway, kita beruntung, temen-temen kita ga ada yang nanya kapan nikah.
Him: Iya, nanya juga paling kerja di mana.
Me: Dan gaji berapa.

Introducing one of my great high school classmates, Agus Chandra. ;) Sometimes, when I get all sarcastic and cynical, I wish I could blame my guy high school classmates for shaping me into this. Lols. Ah, I have to thank them, especially Veiz, for showing me the true side of the life or else I would have been another dumbly innocent girl. ;)

Constantly

2011-11-26T21:47:00.005+07:00

No thanks to my allergy, I have been pretty useless for the whole day. *sigh* Urghh.. Mr. Fever has made his visit as well. Was all blue and red until his name popped out on my screen.

Him: Random thought. Don’t you wish that someone would somehow …
Me: What?
Him: Come over to your boarding house and yell loudly. "CIN EEEEEEEEEEENG!!!!!! ENG CIIIIEEEEEM!!!"
Me: Huahuahauha! Sikui!!
Him: I know it would be some kind of heavenly song to your ears. That’s how mental we are. We get excited over things that are shocking to others.
Me: I love you for your mental sickness! Huhauhaua!!
Him: You don’t even have to tell me how you miss people calling you Cin Eng vocally and verbally because I know it would be too shameful for you to admit it.
Me: Hell would freeze before I start missing it.
Him: Judging by how you nag back everytime you were addressed such an extraordinarily honorary name, please don’t deny it. I already know. And don’t admit it either. Reversed psychology.
Me: Kimaks.
Him: I would've accepted your denial if it was plain 'no' over some hell-would-freeze shit.
Me: Huhuahuahha. Sialan.
Him: Hahaha.

Believe it or not, I copied the sentences verbatim. That 无聊 convo we had in ym made my day. ;)

Oh, anyway, I've been spending my days catching up with TV series. I agree with people saying Gossip Girl is getting dull and plain, but hell, Chuck Bass is still the prince of my little kingdom! His apology to Blair almost made me cry. No exaggerating.

"I'm sorry for losing my temper the night you told me Louis proposed to you. I'm sorry for not waiting longer at the Empire State Building. I'm sorry for treating you like property. I'm sorry I didn't tell you I loved you when I knew I did. But most of all, I’m sorry that I gave up on us when you never did."

To be honest, there was a time I waited for my own Chuck to make such apology. However, knowing him a little bit too well, I can tell he would never ever admit he's wrong, nor would he admit I am right all this time. ;) Just like how Blair reacted to Chuck, "I hope never giving up on people isn't gonna be my downfall."

Ah, how I miss being the princess. ;)

Jingle of the First Date

2011-11-25T12:01:00.004+07:00

People who don’t know the real I refer me as “the arrogant bitch” or “the snob”. Yeah, heard that several times. Some friends are amazed at my non-caring attitude. Even though being a loner is not something I am proud of, it has always been one of my self-defense systems. I surround myself with invisible walls that function as the human-filter as well. I can’t afford being hurt, especially not by people who don’t matter enough to me.

Some people bring the worst out of me. A few are actually able to bring out the decent side of me. I’m glad despite the hostile “friends” here in Bandung, I’ve got the chance to know a person who knows how to suppress the dark side of mine. You. ;)

Spending time with you is the only chance for me to behave my own age. Not only is it enjoyable, but it is easy as well. I don’t need to act all cute and/or naïve to be accepted. ;) The more I spend my time with you, the more I enjoy your presence. I can’t thank you enough for being my guide in Bandung. I will be forever grateful of you spending time showing me around the city.

To top those amazing things you did for me, there’s that Jakarta little escapade. ;)

As much as I wanted to attend my friend’s wedding party, things seemed to fall apart, no matter how I planned for everything. I was that close to giving up. Then you came and cheered me up instantly. Calming me down AND planning the itinerary. I was so taken aback that the only thing I could do was thanking you endlessly. Thank you.

Like I told you, there would come the day when we would go back and laugh at that Sunday. The Sunday when we spent hours on the road, trying to figure out how to get from A to B. One of the most memorable Sundays.

I will not forget that look on your face. How you sighed so frequently during the drive. When you told me that you're so nervous because that was your first time being alone with a woman in your car. “Gombal,” I replied. How was I supposed to respond? Your statement made me go all speechless. Not to mention the atmosphere in the car got so intense. I admit I didn’t know how to react. Thus, I did what I do best. Being cynical.

I never knew you’re such a good healer. After some stupid arguments with my friend, I went gloomy and it was all over my face. You managed to nurse me back to glee just by patting my head. You have no idea how much those pats helped me get through the hectic night. Thank you.

Remember when you asked me what if my friend asked why we were so late and questioned our whereabouts? I told you I would tell them we were on a date. “Ini date kita yang keberapa?” You asked. “Memangnya selama ini kita pernah nge-date?” I answered. No, I never took any of our hanging out sessions as a date, merely because I think you friendzone me. Don’t you? ;)

To crown you as the Prince Charming of the Night doesn’t even do any justice to your enchanting acts. Thanks to my skyscraper killer heels, I had to depend on your arm the whole night just so I wouldn’t make a complete fool of myself. At first, I thought I would scare you off by being clingy, but oh my, you shocked me again! Never in any of my wild dreams, there would be a guy standing there on the steps, waiting for me with the extravagant hand gestures. To be honest, I was on the cloud nine. Who wouldn’t go nuts when being protected like that? Yet, I said something pretty hurtful. “Lebay,” I mocked you. I went all sarcastic again. Smh.

Another little secret of mine, most of the time, I do mind-blocking. J said I always shut my brain down whenever somebody says something that I have no idea how to react to. Remember when you asked me when I wanted to be hugged and I begged for your pardon? Yap. I did hear that, but I was clueless. I wasn’t sharp enough to comprehend the situation. :(

Things went way too complicated in Jakarta and as hard as I have been ransacking my brain, seems like I am not able to label it. Particularly after you said you wouldn’t know how to explain to your ex if she ever finds out we’re together in Jakarta. Now that we’re both back to Bandung, I think it’s best to assume whatever happened in Jakarta, stays in Jakarta? What do you think? ;)

I enjoy being your student, your friend and sometimes your model. Very much. But don’t you think I don’t deserve to be kept in the dark? ;) It’s pretty exhausting to hide our whatever-ship from people. After all, last time I checked, befriending me hasn’t been considered as a crime. ;)

Reach Out

2011-11-24T20:21:00.004+07:00

You know you can always count on chocolate, ice cream and books ...

... because they will never ever disappoint you.

And never cease to take your mind off of what's been bothering you.

Adrenaline

2011-11-22T20:58:00.001+07:00

Weekend in Jakarta was fun, hectic and of course memorable. Yes, there were some moments I wish I could relive, but like I said, one day I would look back at those moments and have a good laugh. ;) And I'm literally laughing now btw.

Anyway, despite the two cameras we brought all the time with us, we totally forgot to take loads of pictures. Urm, blame the chaotic situation? Lols.

Lunch.

村姑 picking up the saltiest fries.

Another template smile of mine. Please ignore my body language.

Us in serious mode.

I don't get why all of us look extremely cheerful here.

And here either.

Chapter V.

Top That

2011-11-19T22:58:00.002+07:00

This may sound cliche: I don't know you anymore. You have changed from my rock to somebody I barely know anymore. Perhaps, I have changed as well. After all, who doesn't? But to lose a person I used to rely on so much in just a blink of eyes, well, that's too harsh.

I assume I could go all dramatic and yell something like, "How could you do this to me?" But I know it won't change anything, and I'm too tired of being patient.

You can't disappoint me more than this. And as you wish, I couldn't care less anymore.

Till I Miss You Two

2011-11-18T09:02:00.006+07:00

Since I lost my phone, checking my e-mail inbox through laptop has been another routine of mine. Nothing beats the feelings of waking up to nice e-mails or messages. ;) Thanks to my friend, these days I've been giggling like siao when I access my e-mail. Blame his candid photos of mine. Was never a fan of candid photos of me as I always look either dumb or grim. Sometimes both. Dumbly grim. Grimly dumb. Smh. Not to mention I have that super eww gummy smile. *facepalm* However, somehow, with some wizardry spells he has, my friend scores some pretty decent candid of mine (as you can see from my previous posts).

Some of the photos he sent me:

Can't wait to be back here soon. >.<"

The tree on the table is merely reflection. Say aww?

View from our table. I bet it would look better at night.

Those look like wishes lanterns, agree? Anyway, are you able to spot us?

LOVE LOVE LOVE this candid photo!

My smile looks genuine. Fiuuhh~~ I thought I would never be able to smile like this again.

Another 村姑。

So, this is how I look when I am serious.

My friend calls this "template smile".

Another template smile.

No idea why he asked me to cover my nose.

All credit goes to him whose name shall not be mentioned. ;)

Till I Miss You

2011-11-17T19:37:00.006+07:00

Thanks to my friend, I could finally cross tiramisu from my to-eat list. Yayyness! Actually we went there to have some macarons (another item on my to-eat list), but the tiramisu on the display was too tempting to be ignored. :">

*nomnomnom*

いただきます！

Me likey how my pale orange nails contrasted the mini purple flower bouquet.

Chapter IV

Drawing Line

2011-11-16T18:23:00.004+07:00

Me: I don't get this constant fear of mine. Like, I am the top of the class yet I am still scared of failing and falling.
Him: It's normal. Everybody is waiting to see you fail. To see you come back to Medan and be ashamed of yourself. And the worst part is, you're aware of it and you want to try your best not to let people have a good time. Clear?
Me: Haish.
Him: Look. Only people close to you are a tad obligated to wake you up. Other kind of friends won't give you shit. They will give you nice cakes wrapping shit. Makin kamu takut, makin fail. Bagusnya sih santai tapi pasti.
Me: Huahuahuahua. Iya, how could I miss 靴 and 机. That's like the worst mistake ever.
Him: Ngapaen kamu worry siang malam? Habis gelap selalu terbit terang. Remember what the long dead Madame Kartini said? So, please don't stop accepting shit from me. I am the only one who would, happily, shit on you.

Me: I won the kanji bingo game yesterday. The prize was only a sachet of instant coffee. However, I felt like yelling, “To your face, morons!!!”
Him: Hahaha. See.. That kind of attitude gives you a shock of adrenaline which tends to give you temporary clumsiness which later causes chaos. Doing something in the hope of revenge is punishing your own self. Do it happily and you’ll be rewarded eventually, in your case, scores and revenge.

Fruit Basket

2011-11-15T20:29:00.004+07:00

Ever since Mr. Appetite is back, I eat like there's no tomorrow. Which is a good thing, perhaps? Anyway, asked the maid to peel a mango for me. When she delivered it to my room, I was like, wtf.

Looks pretty much like sliced green apple, right?

So, apparently, the mangoes I bought aren't ripe enough. *roll eyes* Good thing that it's neither hard nor sour and I enjoyed munching it. *nomnomnom*

Well, I got a little something from my sensei for winning the kanji bingo. It's only a sachet of instant coffee, but a winner is a winner! =pp~

It's as if he knows I need coffee to help me get through his classes.

Missy Me

2011-11-13T15:55:00.004+07:00

They say you dream of somebody because that person misses you. With these two dreams about that certain somebody two days in a row, I guess that person is missing me? ;) But then it would also mean that you dream of me every single day, heh? :">

As I was lying on my bed, hundreds of what-ifs and if-onlys popped out. I used to believe that if I regret nothing, then I won't have any unanswered questions. Ahh~ I hate this emo side of me. It's like nothing is good enough for me.

He often says, "Just because you're not happy, you blame the whole world." *sigh* I miss sitting with him, doing our own stuff and enjoying the silence. I miss how he always tried his best to treat me like a princess even though most of the time I didn't deserve it. I miss how he would let me do whatever I want, eat whatever, as long as I was happy. I miss his home-cooked Indomie goreng. I miss his smell. I miss how he side-eyed me when I said something weird. I miss sharing our absurd music collection. I miss how he would come to my house unannounced. I miss his ridiculous sense of humour. I miss my comfort zone.

And hey, did you know that I miss you the most? The silent long phone call, the unimportant arguments we always had. I miss how we yelled at each other when we're annoyed or just because we felt like doing it. I miss waiting for midnight just so I could nag you with my endless selfish rants. I miss counting days to meeting you. I miss pretending that I never needed you. I miss acting as if I was tough. I miss everything about you. I miss how you were my rock.

I miss those two great guys. I miss being that little girl.

Out of Tune

2011-11-12T20:02:00.004+07:00

Retail therapy is such a bitch. It gives you pseudo-happiness for a tiny while, then leaves you with long term headache. *sigh* Alcohol is way cheaper, huh?

Grocery shopping. See the long paper? That's the receipt. *faint*

My snacks spot. Believe me, it's not all.

Had more photos developed! Yaayy! The board is almost full now! <3

Exclamation Mark

2011-11-11T18:27:00.003+07:00

Jay Chou's newest album is another disappointment, IMO. His new songs are somehow predictable and doesn't feel fresh.

Anyway, these are my most favourite songs from the album:

1. 疗伤烧肉粽 (Healing Hot Meat Buns). Super love the lyrics! Romantic but not cheesy at all!

“烧肉粽如果你想吃不需要等到端午节
烧肉粽你要酸的甜的苦的辣的随时给你
烧肉粽酸甜苦辣的爱情请把它忘记
烧肉粽我可以陪你也让你出气”

2. 超跑女神 (Super Sports Goddess)

3. Mine Mine

Mistletoe

2011-11-11T17:48:00.000+07:00

Mile in These Shoes

2011-11-10T23:00:00.006+07:00

Haven't been myself lately. *sigh* This homesick is prolly the worst one so far. I have no idea which one I miss more, my home or my "home". Either way, it has cost me 2 kgs.

My friend asked me if it is homesick or former-me-sick. Not until when I was getting ready for our photo hunting session did I get what he meant. And yeah, bull's eye!! I miss the former me! The dress + high heels me. The "mature" me. The "dolly" me. I miss being me!

My close friends have been telling me to stick to the real me. But I just can't. I don't know why but ever since I moved to Bandung, I've been taking people's opinion more seriously. The ignorant me slowly evaporated away.

*sigh*

Enough with the mellow sentences.

Had a fun night tonight. Thanks to my friend, my craving for pasta has finally come to an end. I was also given the chance to dress up! Dress plus high heels plus some make-up never cease to make my day. =DD

First time being here.

While waiting for the food.

いただきます！

Seriously have no idea why I posed like this. Smh.

Lots of mushroom!! But too bad, the garlic was as much as the mushroom. >.<"

My cousin would laugh his arse off if he comes across this photo as he's the only one who still calls me kucing (cat).

Chapter III, part 1.

Dessert!!

Chapter III, part 2.

I lied to my sensei this morning, told her I don't like any animal while actually 動物の中で犬が一番好きです。

Not proud of my ngiao2 face.

Picture of the day!!

Daintiness

2011-11-09T21:30:00.002+07:00

Have just found out that my birth flower is Aster. Purple!! >.<"

"Aster is the September birth flower. In ancient times, it was believed that burning aster leaves would drive away evil snakes. Asters have a flower meaning of patience and dantiness. Aster is Latin for star which is referring to the flower's star shape. Aster is closely related to the Chrysanthemum. The aster is considered the other classic autumn flower besides the chyrsanthemum."

Source: here

Underneath the Starlight

2011-11-09T00:00:00.003+07:00

Me: Life was so easy back then yah, yang kupikirkan cuma gajian dan belanja. Sekarang? Backstabbers. Gossipers. Buset. Mao temenan aja harus mikir2 dulu.
Him: I'm not going to talk about how it was the utmost urgency to move to Bandung to you. You don't need people to remind you of that anymore, right? Haiya. Ya sudahlah. Yang sudah terjadi gak usah dipikirkan. Kan jadi pusing.

Then he asked me this super JLEB!! question:
"If there was nothing left in Medan anymore like what you insisted, what is exactly left for you now in Bandung?"

Truth to be told, I don't know, dear. I really have no idea. I've got these feelings that I don't belong in Medan anymore.

Hidden Attack

2011-11-08T20:50:00.005+07:00

The only 正经 photo from last night. Couldn't care less that my body language sux, I just love my facial expression in this photo so so much.

What actually happened:

I look like some 村姑 who's never touched a camera before, I know.

These two photo-hunting sessions reminded me how much I used to take pictures by my camera, not mobile phone. *sigh* More to come, I hope.

Step Outside

2011-11-07T23:38:00.005+07:00

View from my campus building, minutes before sunset.

Red car FTW!

Burger! Like, finally!!

Super love this candid picture!

いただきます！

The guy and the gift.

This guy looks soooo 欠揍！

Currently using this phone. ._____."

Chapter I

Chapter II

お休みなさい！

Take Me Away

2011-11-06T23:30:00.001+07:00

J sent me this photo through YM. Didn't even know this photo existed. Me likey this photo so so much as I look very happy. *sigh*

Can't remember when was the last time I laughed or merely smiled as sincere as I was in the photo. Hate to admit this, but J is right, I've become this bitter old lady ever since I made straight A's my priority.

Let me go home?

Simple Happiness

2011-11-06T09:49:00.001+07:00

I think I've found my wedding song. >.<"

Her Boy and My Man

2011-10-30T13:11:00.002+07:00

&amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;br&amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;&amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;br&amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;&amp;amp;amp;amp;lt;br&amp;amp;amp;amp;gt;

Vicki Riana's boy = Jason Chen
Yosely Liesan's man = Lee Hom
Yes, I'm vain like that.

March On

2011-10-30T13:08:00.001+07:00

同樣的一場日落　同樣你還是沒說
只是抱緊我　時間一到就鬆手

你用一萬個理由　都比沉默還溫柔
為什麼愛我又不斷退後
你害怕的是什麼　你想要的是什麼
站在你背後　我連呼吸都痛

我要　相信你是愛我的　我要　相信你是勇敢的
我煩　時間是最殘酷的　我怎麼等
我要　相信你是愛我的　不要　當我每次唱情歌
眼裡總有太多淚　不停拉扯

我用一萬個答案　解釋我們的距離
到最後發現我全都猜錯
你害怕的是什麼　你想要的是什麼
站在你背後　我連呼吸都痛

你懷裡有太多問號　告訴我怎麼依靠

Bye, Ochie

2011-10-29T21:04:00.002+07:00

I flushed my phone down the toilet.

Yes, I am serious.

There Goes the Effort

2011-10-24T18:54:00.000+07:00

Happened to me today.

Image taken from here.

Haters Gonna Hate

2011-10-23T21:04:00.000+07:00

What Makes You Beautiful

2011-10-22T20:59:00.000+07:00

You're insecure
Don't know what for
You're turning heads when you walk through the door
Don't need make up
To cover up
Being the way that you are is enough

Everyone else in the room can see it
Everyone else but you

[Chorus]
Baby you light up my world like nobody else
The way that you flip your hair gets me overwhelmed
But you when smile at the ground it aint hard to tell
You don't know
You don't know you're beautiful

If only you saw what I can see
You'll understand why I want you so desperately
Right now I'm looking at you and I can't believe
You don't know
You don't know you're beautiful
Oh oh
But that's what makes you beautiful

So c-come on
You got it wrong
To prove I'm right I put it in a song
I don't why
You're being shy
And turn away when I look into your eyes

Everyone else in the room can see it
Everyone else but you

[Chorus]

[Bridge]
Nana Nana Nana Nana
Nana Nana Nana Nana
Nana Nana Nana Nana

Baby you light up my world like nobody else
The way that you flip your hair gets me overwhelmed
But you when smile at the ground it aint hard to tell
You don't know
You don't know you're beautiful

[Chorus]

This and That is Life

2011-10-20T21:27:00.000+07:00

It's a Monday and there's so much to do
You gotta wake up soon cuz it's already noon
Oooooo Oooooo
Ya know it's something special when you roll out of bed
And then you realize life is not over yet
Oooooo Oooooo

Let's get it together
Yeah it happens again
But it doesn't matter
Cuz it's not the end

We got time to improve
Time can renew
I don't know why
But I wanna cry
Cuz this, and that, is life

Oh as this world keeps spinning
You and I keep fishing
Flying kites and wishing
For something nice
And I know there's missing
With every chance I'm taking
But this, and that, is life

It's the loving hate and hating love
It's the ups and downs that carry us all
Oooooo Oooooo
You reach real high at the low hanging clouds
It's hard sometimes with your feet on the ground
Oooooo Oooooo

I'm getting over
Four leaf clovers
Today...oh yeah

Oh as this world keeps spinning
You and I keep fishing
Flying kites and wishing
For something right
And I know there's missing
With every chance I'm taking
But this, and that, and this and that
And this, and that, and this and that
And this, and that...is life

A Moment on the Lips, Forever on the Face

2011-10-19T21:48:00.000+07:00

The effect of the existence of two Medanese at the same place:

14 October 2011

16 October 2011

19 October 2011

See how my face gets wider and wider within days?

Empire State of Mind

2011-10-18T23:27:00.000+07:00

Second day being back to classes and yet assignments are slowly piling up.

It's not that I am super diligent or what but I NEED to finish these tasks before weekend comes so I am able to nua!!

PS: Pancasila mid-test score was announced. Thank God I didn't flunk it!

Blue-ish Red

2011-10-16T13:14:00.002+07:00

Holly: You know those days when you get the mean reds?
George: The mean reds? You mean, like the blues?
Holly: No. The blues are because you're getting fat or it's been raining too long. You're just sad, that's all. The mean reds are horrible. Suddenly you're afraid and you don't know what you're afraid of.

Breakfast at Tiffany's

Not Anybody Else

2011-10-13T23:30:00.001+07:00

Been wishing for the same thing week over week. I'm done asking.

After the Test Has Gone

2011-10-10T15:41:00.005+07:00

For the very first time since I moved here, I've got the chance to nua! Fufufu~~ My mid test was pretty okay, I hope I could pass with flying colours. *pray*

Anyway, Agus' friend came to Bandung last weekend. Agus asked if his friend could crash at my place for some days, which is absolutely okay with me. He forgot to mention that his friend is Korean. =.=" Kim So Young speaks fluent Japanese and English, so we had no difficulties in communicating. She is a wonderful and super brave woman! She has been backpacking for three months and still counting. Her target is one year. Omoo! I can't imagine if I have to travel to places where I can't understand the language.

Pictures!!

With my housemates!
Daevon - So Young onnie - Ci Linda - Ci Dewi - Moi - Lavie

Vianly said whoever sees this picture will never think I'm that kolao girl. =pp

The legendary Korean heart shape.

Vera (my closest classmate here) - So Young onnie - moi - Mbak Ike (she's on honeymoon!)

In the angkot on our way back to my boarding house.

Local people like to eat cilok so very much. And I don't get that.

Booze session!!

皆さん、乾杯！

Buddhist festival in Festival Citylink.

Early Christmas present for me, anyone? *batting eyelashes*

She LOVES everything in J.Co.

Amazed at street singers.

He was like, "Take the picture from this angle, it looks better." Lol?

Sierra.

Bandung night view from Sierra.

That's a wrap!

PS: I know I look neck-less in the last photo. =.="

Convo of the Day

2011-10-09T14:28:00.000+07:00

Goes: Habis ini mau ke vihara.
Me: Loe ngasal bener. Semalam nge-pub, pagi ini ke vihara.

*15 minutes later*

Goes: Kayaknya ada orang-orang yang familiar dari night club kemarin di vihara ini. Gw ga sendiri, Yos.

HUAHAUHAUHUA!!

Still in Love with You

2011-10-05T14:48:00.001+07:00

一閃一閃亮晶晶　留下歲月的痕跡
我的世界的重心　依然還是你
一年一年又一年　飛逝僅在一轉眼
唯一永遠不改變　是不停的改變
我不像從前的自己　你也有點不像你
但在我眼中你的笑　依然的美麗
日子只能往前走　一個方向順時鐘
不知道愛有多久　所以要讓你懂
我依然愛你　將是唯一的退路
我依然珍惜　時時刻刻的幸福
你每個呼吸　每個動作　每個表情
到最後　一定會　依然愛你
(依然愛你　依然愛你…)

我不像從前的自己　你也有點不像你
但在我眼中你的笑　依然的美麗
日子只能往前走　一個方向順時鐘
不知道愛有多久　所以要讓你懂
我依然愛你　就是唯一的退路
我依然珍惜　時時刻刻的幸福
你每個呼吸　每個動作　每個表情
到最後　一定會　依然愛你
(依然愛你　依然愛你…)

我依然愛你　或許是命中注定
多年之後　任何人都無法代替
那些時光　是我這一輩子最美好的
那些回憶　依然無法忘記
我依然愛你　這是唯一的退路
我依然珍惜　時時刻刻的幸福
你每個呼吸　每個動作　每個表情
到永遠　一定會　依然愛你

Quote of the Day

2011-10-04T14:44:00.000+07:00

Maybe it's not blood bonds that makes us a family. Perhaps it's the people who know our secrets and love us anyway, so we can finally be ourselves.

~ Gossip Girl ~

My Break

2011-10-03T16:00:00.001+07:00

The Kit Kat bar which makes me smile ear to ear. Haters may hate, but this bar of chocolate showed me that friendship still exists.

Fire Power to the Maximum

2011-10-01T18:47:00.000+07:00

My heart literally skipped a beat when I was watching this MV. Not to mention I did lose my breath a couple of times! No, I'm not exaggerating! Dictionaries should change their definition to "perfection = Lee Hom". I have this theory that whichever lady who doesn't like Lee Hom must be gay! What's not to like from him?

Don't think I would buy this album as it's a "the best collection". :(

Unity in Harmony

2011-10-01T15:51:00.000+07:00

My very first time wearing batik!! Yayyness!!

Ribka senpai (my mentor) with her ulos

12 C and the mentor

Peace Be Upon You

2011-09-29T19:02:00.000+07:00

Dear haters,

You don't like me being the center of attention? Are you sure I act like I'm the queen or is it you who pay too much attention to me? Funny how you guys claim to be my haters yet you are aware of every minute changes I've got. Or how you ask around about me. Like, why would you want to know? When I hate somebody as much as you hate me, I won't spend any of my precious time interviewing people about the person I dislike.

I guess you just want to be like me, heh? ;)

Tips from me: If you hate me because I shine brightly, why not attempt to shine even brighter than me? Rather than wasting your time talking behind my back? ;)

Yours sincerely,
Me

Tentang Hujan dan Kamu

2011-09-18T18:52:00.002+07:00

I used to love rain a lot. Hujan yang aku nanti-nantikan karena bisa menjadi alasan absen dari rutinitas yang membosankan. Hujan yang mengusir hawa panas di Medan. Aku selalu merasa tenang setiap kali hujan mengguyur bumi. It makes me believe, whatever problem I have, it will be swept away too.

You have no idea about this. Sejak akhir tahun lalu, aku benci hujan. And surprisingly, it's because of you. Ya, kamu. Setiap kali hujan turun, aku ingat kamu. Tepatnya ke suatu malam di November'10, malam ketika aku kelaparan karena belum makan seharian, tetapi terlalu keras kepala dan penakut untuk nekat keluar di kota yang saat itu masih cukup asing bagiku.

I realised you're mad at me. Kamu memarahiku, mengutuk kemanjaanku pada dirimu, ketergantungan yang sampai saat ini tak bisa kujelaskan sebabnya. It's always been like that, I just know I can always depend on you, wherever and whenever.

You did come. Yeah, despite your swearing and annoyance, you're there, in that hotel room, looking at this spoiled brat with your trademark smirk. Terima kasih kamu sudah menerjang hujan demi menemaniku makan. Moreover, thanks for your understanding.

That night was one of the most memorable nights. You showed me the other side of you, the childish you, the side that I'd never known you have. Tawamu yang kekanak-kanakan ketika kamu berhasil merebut bantal dariku. Senyum menyebalkan yang tersungging sembari bertanya, "Lho, uda ngambek gegara ga dapat bantal?" God knows how I wish I could have frozen that moment. Kita bercanda dan tertawa lepas, sesuatu yang hampir tak pernah kita lakukan.

Just like every good thing in this life, it had to end. Mungkin itu salahku karena mengungkit topik itu. Atau mungkin itu hanyalah bom waktu yang meledak. Yang aku tahu pasti, di malam itu juga lah aku melihat sisi lain lagi darimu, the fragile you. You have no clue how much I was hurt when you told me I was fake. When you accused me for being selfish. Or when you told me I never cared about you, that everything was an act.

"Lu selalu bilang gw gengsian, tapi lu sadar ga sih, lu itu jauh lebih gengsian," katamu waktu itu. Aku terhenyak, tak pernah terbersit kalau aku membawa label "gengsian". "Yang benar aja, kalo memang aku gengsian, aku ga bakal ada di sini, di kota ini, demi ngebuktiin sesuatu yang bahkan aku ga tau itu apa," belaku.

"Lu bahkan ga tau kalo lu egois. Lu tau ga apa yang gw alami? Yang gw jalani belakangan ini? Lu selalu dan selalu mengeluh tentang hidup lu, tanpa pernah mau tau tentang gw," lanjutmu. Aku ingat betul, aku terdiam sebelum menjawabmu dengan dingin, "Gimana aku bisa tau kalo tiap kali aku nanya kamu, kamu langsung bilang aku kepo? Dan kamu selalu bilang aku ga perlu tau what's going on with your life."

Kita berdua terdiam.

"Hati-hati ya di jalan," kataku sambil melihat ke luar jendela. Yah, aku memang mengusirmu secara halus. I admit I was being coward, aku tak tahu apa yang akan terjadi kalau aku nekat berada di ruangan yang sama denganmu lebih lama lagi, we both know patience isn't our virtue.

Kamu berlalu setelah menghujamkan tatapan dinginmu.

That was the turning point. I've been struggling hard to be tough. Counting on you isn't as easy as 1, 2, 3 anymore. We changed drastically, thanks to that one night. Aku yang dulu selalu sabar tiap kali kamu naik darah telah lenyap. Now we are like two people whose achievement is when we manage to hurt each other.

I'm proud to say I've coped with the loss pretty well, tetapi semuanya kembali ke titik nol setiap kali hujan turun. Rain never ceases to bring me back to that night, the point of no return.

And this afternoon, it happened again. The heavy rain showered me with those memories with you.

They say home is where you're needed. Now that I think I don't need you as much as in the past, does it mean you're not my home anymore?

I miss you.

First Perfection

2011-09-08T11:55:00.001+07:00

Can't wait to see more!

PS: Yeah, can't believe I'm grade-oriented now.

Random Thoughts of the Day

2011-09-01T16:53:00.002+07:00

1. Which one is better: having eff-ed relationship but everybody sees the chemistry between you OR being in a secretive relationship that nobody knows you're his/hers.

2. Mosquitoes exist as lizards' food. Now, tell me why do cockroaches exist?

3. Why is it when you decide not to be in touch so often, the universe makes you look for him/her?

4. Why is my English so messed up nowadays?

5. A certain friend changed after being in a relationship. (S)he is not fun anymore. Not to mention (s)he underestimates friends who are still single. Why so? What's so great about seeing somebody? I was dating J for almost 4 years, and the relationship didn't change any bit of us.

6. When will I quit being a loner? *facepalm*

7. What differs "break up" and "dump"? Both involve two broken hearts, right? Why does "break up" sound more humanly?

Bye for Now

2011-07-24T21:14:00.002+07:00

Tonight: Medan
Tomorrow: Bandung

So long.

What the Hell

2011-07-22T12:00:00.001+07:00

Scraping the Sky

2011-07-21T21:20:00.001+07:00

Skies are crying,
I am watching,
Catching teardrops in my hands.
Only silence, as it's ending,
Like we never had a chance.
Do you have to make me feel
Like there's nothing left of me?

You can take everything I have,
You can break everything I am,
Like I'm made of glass,
Like I'm made of paper.
Go on and try to tear me down.
I will be rising from the ground,
Like a skyscraper,
Like a skyscraper.

As the smoke clears,
I awaken,
And untangle you from me.
Would it make you feel better
To watch me, while I bleed?
All my windows still are broken,
But I'm standing on my feet.
You can take everything I have,
You can break everything I am,
Like I'm made of glass,
Like I'm made of paper.
Go on and try to tear me down.
I will be rising from the ground,
Like a skyscraper,
Like a skyscraper.

Go run, run, run.
I'm gonna stay right here,
Watch you disappear.
Yeah, ohh.
Go run, run, run.
Yeah, it's a long way down,
But I am closer to the clouds,
Up here.

You can take everything I have,
You can break everything I am,
Like I'm made of glass,
Like I'm made of paper.

Ohhh

Go on and try to tear me down.
I will be rising from the ground,
Like a skyscraper,
Like a skyscraper.
(Like a skyscraper)
Like a skyscraper,
Like a skyscraper.

Smile of the Day

2011-07-18T18:00:00.001+07:00

So, according to her, being hungry incessantly is a kind of a sickness. =))

Do Donate

2011-07-17T17:48:00.001+07:00

Went to an orphanage in Glugur with Vianly and her friends on Saturday. When they told the caretaker they wanted to donate some food, the guy asked them what their intention was. Yeah, in this era, every single deed is questioned, even a good one.

In Grand Aston's toilet while waiting for Vianly's friend. What's with girls and full length mirror?

Anyway, Vianly's friend (the one in pink T-shirt) thought I was the same age with them. Huahuahuaa!! I laughed so hard! But then when I think about it again, I guess it means I look or behave childishly. *facepalm*

Hands Up!!

2011-07-15T18:02:00.001+07:00

This song + MV resurrect my already-died love for them. Omooo!! Cinca daebak!! Otokkhe otokkhe??

Lighters of Day

2011-07-14T21:33:00.005+07:00

1. Random bbm chat with Vianly. Free lunch at Babura this Saturday!! Yaayyness! Nyumsness!

2. Nd sent me this photo through bbm. Can't wait till I've got time to get the files from him. Me want to enlarge the photo at least 24"!!

Photographer: Andy Susanto

Make-up & hair-do by: Heru Heriawan
Photo editor: Jeff Kie
Special thanks to Brides of Dejavu for the studio!

3. Re-watched Bao Bei (Baby Chinese version) by Jason Chen and couldn't stop smiling. His mischievous smile totally wins!! Not to mention his cute facial expressions.

4. This video is just ohmyohmysoawesomeicantstandit!! Joseph Vincent alone sure kills already. Put him together with Jason Chen in one screen, it's like mass murder. Who can resist these two cutie pies???

Sneaky Snakes

2011-07-13T11:52:00.008+07:00

Beberapa hari lalu, temen gw ganti foto bbm dia. Gw terpesona dan langsung ngotot mau difotoin juga!! For free, of course. Yeah, I'm a cheapskate, so? =pp

I honestly thought the snakes part was a joke.

Sumpah gw antusias banget! Walaupun super deg-degan mau difotoin bareng ular. =.=" Sapa sih yang ga merasa takut sama ular? Gimana kalo dipatok coba? Berabe ga tuh?

Half-way through the make-up. Gw ngirim foto ini ke Vianly, dan malah ditanyain balik itu siapa. Jadi beda banget kah muka gw? Make-up dan hair-do ga nyampe dua jam. Coba bandingin sama Syahrini yang kudu ngabisin 3-4 jam buat make-up. Lols. Gw suka banget sama eye make-up gw, mata gw yang belo jadi makin belo dan hidup banget.

Setelah selesai semuanya dan siap-siap buat difoto dengan rambut kayak super saiya. Lols!!

Waktu lagi siap-siap di studio, eh ga ada yang berani ngeluarin itu ular-ular dari kandang. Salah satu kru di sana bilang, "Eh, yang mau foto dan yang mau difoto pada ga berani pegang itu ular, gimana fotonya ntar?" Huahuahua! Akhirnya minta bantuan sama editor foto buat ngambilin itu ular-ular. Awal-awal difoto berasa gelo bener pegang2 bersisik-lembut-tak-bertulang (baca: ular), setelah beberapa menit, malah merasa ular-ular itu lucu, ga nyeremin. Akhirnya malah gw main-mainin deh. =pp Mungkin karena si ular uda pewe sama gw atau gimana yah, gw dipipisin salah satu ular. Serius! Lagi pegang-pegang dan tiba-tiba ada yang menetes dari ular itu. Plus something pretty solid, which I'm pretty sure is its feces! Eww max! Semuanya pada ngakak ngeliat gw jejeritan heboh. TT____________TT

Sesi foto-foto kemarin itu so far yang paling asyik dan paling santai buat gw. Sesi-sesi sebelumnya gw berasa dikasih beban mental banget, harus bagus harus keren harus ekspresif dlsb, jadinya gw berasa terkukung gitu. Hiks. Padahal Noah dan Roy ga gimana-gimana, cuma gw yang merasa bersalah aja kalo hasilnya jelek. Ya namanya juga gw cuma cewek biasa, bukan model. Tapi yang kemarin itu BEDA! Mungkin karena gw sudah terbawa suasana santai karena main-main sama ular, bisa jadi karena gw merasa nyaman sama yang fotoin.

Foto-foto cuma sejam gitu sepertinya. Si fotografer merasa uda dapat foto yang dese mau. Waktu mau buka file itu foto-foto di komputer, gw deg-degan lagi! Takut banget kalau hasilnya jelek dan mengecewakan. :( Merasa bersalah banget sama yang uda ngedandanin dan fotoin.

Ternyata hasilnya OK! Gw suka banget! Demen bener! Cunuk conk!

Photographer: Andy Susanto
Make-up & hair-do by: Heru Heriawan
Photo editor: Jeff Kie
Special thanks to Brides of Dejavu for the studio!

We ended our (not so) hardworking day by dinner in Lekker. Yours truly went there with full make-up! Picture as the proof:

Moi and the photographer, Andy.

Please ignore my super dark skin. *blaming the lighting*

Tonight

2011-07-08T23:14:00.001+07:00

This blog is getting emo. No good no good. I miss babbling randomly about how I spend my day. Anyway, today is my last night in Bandung. For now, at least. Will be back to Medan tomorrow! Yaayy!! Too bad I get to stay for around two weeks only because I have to join TOEFL test on 27th. Urgh!

Went to the university this afternoon to settle some registration stuff and get my Student ID.

I must have acted like some lost child that two seniors approached me and offered some help. "Ngambil jurusan apa, dek?" Ohmy!! It's extremely hard to keep my face straight when both of them addressed me as "dek". Lols! I'm older than them! Tsk!! Unless there are some mahasiswa abadi in the college, I'll definitely be the most "senior" there. *facepalm*

I almost laughed when the administration staff passed me my Student ID. I don't know why but I sincerely think I look like a 村姑！A village girl who is so eager to see the world. Lols!! A bit true, I guess. =pp

Bought my glasses frame in IP. Finally! Actually, I've seen the frame couple of days ago, but I was still not sure if it's what I want. (background vocal: girls) Can't wait to buy lenses the day after tomorrow! Welcome back, glasses! Decided to go to Ciwalk as I hadn't been there during my 3-week stay. It's unusual since Ciwalk was my favourite mall back then. Didn't get anything there though. Malls aren't exactly students' best friend.

Btw, I've just found out that there are two comic rentals in the food court opposite the university! Not one, but TWO! I fell in love with Gubuk Dongeng (if I'm not mistaken). They have wide range of comic collections! Even the rare ones! Not to mention, their novels are up to date as well. The very first thing I'll do when I come back here is to apply for membership there. The only dark side is renting novel is a bit pricey these days.

That pretty much sums up what I did today. Nighty night!!

Breathing Pain

2011-07-06T21:47:00.001+07:00

I wish there was an exact term or word in English to describe what I'm feeling now. It's like I was ruined but the damage made me whole. Or that somebody disappointed me but I'm satisfied instead. Oxymoron yes?

Up until this moment, I have no doubt that it was a moment of losing control. But then if we really give it a second thought, that is not the sort of thing people might have accidentally done. I guess I want to believe that we might have planned it unconsciously, or it was an arrangement that neither of us expected to come true. Or we didn't mean to go to that extent.

One is always accused of taking things too seriously when it's supposed to be pure fun. In one's defense, fun wouldn't have lasted this long, would it?

Hhhh.

I like it like it was. Go back, please?

Countdown

2011-06-30T23:45:00.001+07:00

My last post sounds like I'm broken-hearted. Hhhh. That's not the story, in case any of you is wondering. As if. Lols.

It's just, being all by myself in a city that is (almost) foreign to me is not as easy as I thought.

10 more days and I'm home!! Never thought I would say this, but here it goes, "I MISS MEDAN!!"

Not-so-homey Home

2011-06-30T11:48:00.001+07:00

"Home is anywhere you feel safe," say them.

Too bad that home was ruined since the moment you decided to leave me alone.

I wouldn't say I felt safe with you by my side. Protected is better. What's the difference, you ask? Hmm.. Being safe is overrated, I can still be hurt by anybody. However, when you were still next to me, I always knew you somehow would drag me out of any harm.

May I go home?

PS: Literally smell like somebody you miss the most is adding salt to the injury. ;)

Fighting for Air

2011-06-26T23:41:00.002+07:00

You thought ...
... nothing would bother you anymore.
... you'd put yourself together.
... you'd won the battle.
... everything had ended.
... disappointment had left you for good.
... none would trigger your anger.
... giving the benefit of the doubt was wise.
... time would change somebody's mind set.

Until it struck you, nothing is as simple as it's seen. Blaming yourself (or someone else) for the pain your innocence brought you does no good.

A really simple question - a 3-letter question word - why. Why? And you've never got any answer. There's never any reply to a question of such simplicity, merely because the answer is of great complexity.

It might be better if we could actually stop thinking too much and just do. No matter what the risk is. Life would be so much more adventurous and thrilling, wouldn't it?

Jar of Hearts

2011-06-12T22:01:00.001+07:00

No, I can't take one more step towards you
‘Cause all that's waiting is regret
Don't you know I'm not your ghost anymore
You lost the love I loved the most

I learned to live, half alive
And now you want me one more time

[Chorus:]
Who do you think you are?
Runnin' 'round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You're gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
So don't come back for me
Who do you think you are?

I hear you're asking all around
If I am anywhere to be found
But I have grown too strong
To ever fall back in your arms

I've learned to live, half alive
And now you want me one more time

[Chorus]

It took so long just to feel alright
Remember how to put back the light in my eyes
I wish I had missed the first time that we kissed
‘Cause you broke all your promises
And now you're back
You don't get to get me back

Who do you think you are?
Runnin' 'round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You're gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
Don't come back for me
Don't come back at all

Who do you think you are?
Runnin' 'round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart
You're gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
Don't come back for me
Don't come back at all

Who do you think you are?
Who do you think you are?
Who do you think you are?

君はあたしにだけのeverything

2011-06-10T21:38:00.004+07:00

Fangirl-ing mode: ON!!

You Know Me So Well

2011-06-08T16:46:00.002+07:00

Him: You know me too well. I just can't take your opinion for it's more to subjective than objective. Give me XX's opinion right now and I would swallow it like a piece of KFC.
Me: You believe her more than me? You. I. End.
Him: With all respect, it's not like that. The fact that you know me so well makes me unable to take your opinion as a standard.

Girl Who Reads

2011-06-05T17:15:00.002+07:00

Date a girl who reads. Date a girl who spends her money on books instead of clothes. She has problems with closet space because she has too many books. Date a girl who has a list of books she wants to read, who has had a library card since she was twelve.

Find a girl who reads. You'll know that she does because she will always have an unread book in her bag. She's the one lovingly looking over the shelves in the bookstore, the one who quietly cries out when she finds the book she wants. You see the weird chick sniffing the pages of an old book in a second hand book shop? That's the reader. They can never resist smelling the pages, especially when they are yellow.

She's the girl reading while waiting in that coffee shop down the street. If you take a peek at her mug, the non-dairy creamer is floating on top because she's kind of engrossed already. Lost in a world of the author's making. Sit down. She might give you a glare, as most girls who read do not like to be interrupted. Ask her if she likes the book.

Buy her another cup of coffee.

Let her know what you really think of Murakami. See if she got through the first chapter of Fellowship. Understand that if she says she understood James Joyce's Ulysses she's just saying that to sound intelligent. Ask her if she loves Alice or she would like to be Alice.

It's easy to date a girl who reads. Give her books for her birthday, for Christmas and for anniversaries. Give her the gift of words, in poetry, in song. Give her Neruda, Pound, Sexton, Cummings. Let her know that you understand that words are love. Understand that she knows the difference between books and reality but by God, she's going to try to make her life a little like her favourite book. It will never be your fault if she does.

She has to give it a shot somehow.

Lie to her. If she understands syntax, she will understand you need to lie. Behind words are other things: motivation, value, nuance, dialogue. It will not be the end of the world.

Fail her. Because a girl who reads knows that failure always leads up to the climax. Because girls who understand that all things will come to end. That you can always write a sequel. That you can begin again and again and still be the hero. That life is meant to have a villain or two.

Why be frightened of everything that you are not. Girls who read understand that people, like characters, develop. Except in the Twilight series.

If you find a girl who reads, keep her close. When you find her up at 2 AM clutching a book to her chest and weeping, make her a cup of tea and hold her. You may lose her for a couple of hours but she will always come back to you. She'll talk as if the characters in the book are real, because for a while, they always are.

You will propose on a hot air balloon. Or during a rock concert. Or very casually next time she's sick. Over Skype.

You will smile so hard you will wonder why your heart hasn't burst and bled out all over your chest yet. You will write the story of your lives, have kids with strange names and even stranger tastes. She will introduce your children to the Cat in the Hat and Aslan, maybe in the same day. You will walk the winters of your old age together and she will recite Keats under her breath while you shake the snow off your boots.

Date a girl who reads because you deserve it. You deserve a girl who can give you the most colourful life imaginable. If you can only give her monotony, and stale hours and half-baked proposals, then you're better off alone. If you want the world and the worlds beyond it, date a girl who reads.

Or better yet, date a girl who writes.

Rosemarie Urquico

The Cure

2011-05-31T12:02:00.002+07:00

Was watching Grey's Anatomy and I was like, "OH! I'm gonna need betadine." Another scenes from the series made the meds list longer and longer. Aspirin. Inhaler. Diarrhoea meds. Medicated oil. Band aid. So on and so on.

Then I started freaking out! What if I fall sick when I am there? And there's no one nursing me? What if I get an incompetent doctor? What if I'm allergic to the meds? WHAT IF??

SHIT!

会いたい

2011-05-30T20:17:00.000+07:00

在地球的另一个方向
和你心成最远的距离
我伸手不见五指
也想写封信给你
告诉你我今天的故事
在巴黎的街头
下了一整天的雨
停不了想你的情绪
古老的城市里仿佛总有说不完的故事
像蒙娜丽莎的微笑
永远是个迷
想和你分享所有的浪漫就在今夜
我控制不了自己
只想打电话给你
aitai 爱早已
用纯洁微风的魔力填满和你的距离
aitai 好想你
今夜的天气还好吗
巴黎仍飘着细雨
冷冷的雨
也许会有点疯狂
如果飞去找你
我想你的感觉
hu~ yeah 让我不能自己
aitai 爱早已
用纯洁微风的魔力填满和你的距离
aitai 好想你
今夜的天气还好吗
巴黎仍飘着细雨
冷冷的雨